Superbowl XLVI Stream of Consciousness

So last year I decided to stay up and watch the Superbowl. It's my way of being close to The Americans. (I miss them you know.) It was all kinds of funny, mainly because I had no idea what was going on and because by the end I was almost delirious with lack of sleep. I kept a running commentary on Blogger as I watching it to record my thoughts and it made me laugh. You can read these random thoughts here.

This year it snuck up on me, I didn't see it coming and didn't realise it was on until the day before. I would be all set to stay up again but I've been a sick person for the past couple of weeks (hi tonsillitis!) so I kind of need to sleep and not go into work on 4 hours sleep. But I thought I would just see how long I last this year and keep a note of my thoughts again.

So here we go.....

Pre-game

- Still don't really know who I'm supporting. I decided to go for the New York Giants because they're based in New Jersey and I like Jersey Shore. It's tenuous but it's all I've got.

- HOLD UP. I just saw a ridiculously fit bloke called Tom Brady. He plays for the New England Patriots, I might switch my allegiance. (Seriously, Google Tom Brady and look at the images. He's very all-American looking which isn't normally what I'd go for but I won't lie, I wouldn't say no.)

- Aaah apparently Rob Gronkowski suffered a high ankle sprain 2 weeks ago - remember Eddie the Ankle Egg? That was totally a high ankle sprain! Look at me with the same injury!

- Oooh Kelly Clarkson singing the National Anthem. She's looking good. Some of those kids singing behind her need a good slap though.

1st Quarter

- Ok the same thing happened last year - why are they wearing the same coloured pants?! I know that one team has blue shirts on and one team has white shirts on, but would it be too much to ask for both teams not to be wearing silver pants?!

- Seriously. I had a year to learn the rules of this game. Why didn't I do it?!

- Some of the players seem to have little white rags hanging out of the back of their pants. What the hell is that about?!

- Best thing about watching The Superbowl on the BBC is the way they have to keep jumping back to the studio every time there's an ad break in America. This time they went back to the game, there was the 1st down (see! I'm learning the terminology!) and then they came back to the studio - it took about 30 seconds.

- Should probably listen to what they're saying in the studio instead of writing blog posts...

2nd Quarter

- Aaah the white rags are for wiping their hands. Good thing, it would be a shame to get those silver pants dirty.

- I've found this website which I'm desperately trying to read to make sense of things. It's ok I guess but it's not helping massively to be honest.

- Good lord, Stephen Tyler quite literally looks like a woman. A woman who's had bad plastic surgery. I'm almost positive that is not the look he's going for.

- I think I have a winner when it comes to explaining terminology to me. For ages I've never understand this 3rd & 6 and 2nd & 9 etc etc. This page just explained it to me! Bonus. I'm on it now, I might just have more  of an understanding.

- Someone named their child Wes Welker. Seriously?!

- It has just occurred to me that although I might be all smug about understanding 'downs', I have absolutely no idea how they actually score points...

- "He's not a normal human being" - quote of the match. About this guy. Apparently because he moves too quickly for someone of his size - good point, he's almost 20 stone, he shouldn't be spritely.

- Brilliant. You know that American Football is made up of very large men when you see someone who looks like a complete midget and he turns out to be a kind of average 5'8".

Half-time!

-  Screw the football, it's all about Madonna. What an entrance!

- Holy feck she almost fell.

- Waaaaaaaah! LMFAO are on stage with her!! PartyRock!!

- Hell yeah, break out Like a Prayer. Hang on a minute though, when the hell did she put that long coat on?

- Awesome. What a show. Proper dicked on the poor effort made by the Black Eyed Peas last year.

3rd Quarter

- Oh sweet jesus. That break was so long I'd kind of forgotten that there was a game even going on.

- Touchdown for the Patriots! I now know that you get 6 points for a touchdown. At this rate, it'll only take me another 14 years to learn all the rules.

- I'm officially flagging. But it is 1.40am so I'm not going to be too hard on myself.

- Good lord. They're talking about play cards. This might be the most hugely tactical game I've ever seen. It appears it isn't just about big men throwing themselves at each other. It's massively complicated. Major respect for these guys.

4th Quarter

- Ooh I fell asleep for a bit and now there's only 2 points in it. No idea what happened but I'm sure I should be excited.

.......

And then I missed the rest. I went off to the land of nod and missed the rest of the final quarter - "You couldn't stay awake for 15 minutes?" I hear you say. True, but 15 minutes of play in The Superbowl takes about 45 minutes to play out.

I woke up briefly to see ticker tape flying about everywhere before nodding back off again. Too bad because it means I missed the Giants turnaround.

I might not have managed to stay up and watch the whole thing but this year was the year that I think I finally began to 'get' Superbowl. I'm beginning to understand the rules, I have absolutely bucketloads more respect for the game than I did and next year, next year, I swear to God I will have figured it all out.

Probably.