I made one of the best mis-reading of a text the other day and it has to be shared with you for two reasons. The first being that it was hilarious. The second being that today's BEDM topic is 'pampering' and if you know me you know that that is a topic about which I know nothing.
I could write a terribly generic post a Lush bathbomb and a glass of wine, or some hand-cream and a lovely nail varnish, but I'm guessing you could probably read 10,000 other BEDM posts that will be along that line.
Instead I will give you a laugh.
So this post involves Heather of Little Tin Bird - say hello Heather.
I sent Heather a text last week in which I enquired how her and Little Tin Bird were doing.
She replied the following;
"...[We're] ok, better than the last couple of weeks which have been full of nappy rash, poo, more poo, nappy rash ointment, poo in the bath and teeth..."
I was shocked. I have been around babies and I know that the poo goes everywhere. But teeth? Teeth?! This was a new one on me.
"Wait. Was the poo in your teeth or his? Why am I even asking?!..."
As I waited for the reply I could only think about how gross motherhood is. You do get a cute baby but poo in teeth? That is just a step too far and definitely one to bear in mind if you decide to breed.
Finally the reply that I wasn't sure I wasn't to read came:
"Sorry I meant teething not poo in teeth thank GOD..."
At which point I collapsed on my bed in paroxysms. I had to take cotton wool and eye make-up remover to my face as my mascara and eyeliner poured down my cheeks, stinging my eyes as I wept at my mistake.
Poo in the teeth? Don't be ridiculous.
Although I would imagine if you had poo in your teeth (and indeed poo in your bath) you would be in need of some pampering...
SEAMLESS SEQUE TO TODAY'S BEDM TOPIC