What my blog is not

“Hey!

 I hope this email finds you well! My name's Sophie and i'm writing from social media company Social Network Solutions, to say hello as I love your blog!

 If you haven't come across us before we are one of the largest fashion and beauty based social media companies in the UK. We work with 100's of fashion retailers from high street fashion labels to independent boutiques - all who are looking to increase their awareness via the blogging community, and we are currently looking to connect our fashion retailers with some of the most creative and inspiring bloggers on the internet.

I think your blog would be perfect for what we do, and I wanted to get in touch and see if you would like to be part of our blogger collective. Meaning that we can suggest your blog to our fashion retailers and will hopefully be able to provide you with clothes and beauty products to review!

I would love for you to get involved and to be able to add you to the list of bloggers we already work with, we can then let our fashion retailers know that you would like to be sent samples for review. I am also a blogger at Across The Universe and will be around to help you out with any questions or queries you may have regarding this new program so feel free to contact me at any point.

If you are interested please fill in your details here and we'll get you added straight away :)

Have a great week!

 Regards,

 Sophie Palmer”

 

I received the above e-mail the other day.

How lovely. Everyone loves to get e-mail don’t they?

And what a lovely opener. Sophie wants “to say hello as I love your blog!” – How amazing is that?! I love it when people tell me they love my blog. It’s the bestest and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I started to suspect that Sophie might just be lying to me when I read the rest of the e-mail – apparently Social Network Solutions “work with 100's of fashion retailers from high street fashion labels to independent boutiques.” – well that’s awesome Sophster but what’s that go to do with me?

“I think your blog would be perfect for what we do”

I beg your pardon?

Let’s read that line again…

“I think your blog would be perfect for what we do”

Well this is weird. Sophie loves my blog, she said so. And if she loves my blog then why would she think I’d be perfect to be put in touch with fashion and beauty retailers?

Is it the literally zeros of beauty reviews I do?

Is it the one fashion post I did in which I took the piss out of my inability to do fashion blogging?

Is it the fact that I constantly lament the 100s of incredibly boring and tedious blogs in which people lazily review exactly the same products over and over and over and over and over again (did you know that Next do homeware? I do. I know so much that I now don’t want to go near the bloody place after seeing 12,000 of the same blog post regurgitated)?

Because I’ve got to tell you, I think my blog is the opposite of what you do.

Maybe. Just maybe. You should actually look at the blog in question before you e-mail them.

Wait a minute.

Does this mean she doesn’t really love my blog?

Now my feelings are hurt.